I Was Wrong

Now i know. Its all coming back to me, nice and clear. I just didnt build my "Raakayee Talkies" on Miss. Murphy's land after cheating her blind father over a game of "aadu puli aattam" (the slightly-violent, indigenous version of chess). I guess i did something even worse, like screen ramarajan (a supreme being who turns angry bulls into milk-laden cows by singing) and vijayakanth (a matchless hero who literally "repels" electricity and blasts transformers) movies in turns to make a quick buck. Yeah, that should have been more like it coz i dont think anyone can do anything heartless than that.

The reason why you are seeing this blog is because, murphy got reminded of misogynistic-me tying him (her??) up and making her watch "Villupattukaran" and "Vallarasu" in one sitting, had a small talk with the powers-that-be and ordered another barrage of rain as my weekend special. I'm sure hez up there watching something pleasant, say, sharapova playing pierce or the likes. But then, if i had actually made someone watch "Vill." and "Vall.", i guess they'd be justified even if they mail-order a deluge to drown me.

I dont know how murphy looks like. But i reckon he would look like that figure which apparates in the middle of the rain everytime i go out and check if it has stopped. Its okay if it stares at me, itz actually okay even if it laughs at me, but the unnerving thing is that it does that with a hyena-like howl which goes "machan maatikinaru, kodiya naatikinaaru" (translates to : the brother in law is caught, and he has hoisted the flag .. means: dude, you screwed, and royally at that .. now why a brother-in-law hoisting a flag could mean someone screwed is debatable, but chennai lingo enthusiasts have had their final word already).

Either that, or i have religiously watched the multiple re-runs of "Mummy" on HBO.

Notes:

Villupatukkaran - denotes a Singer, who plays a bow-like-instrument, only turned upside down. In this case referring to the hero who is a professional, world-touring, crowd-pulling, jibba-wearing artiste. "Villupaatukaran" is a timeless Ramarajan classic. Like any other Ramarajan movie, the highest allocation in the budget was the "lipstick and rouge kit" for ramarajan. The heroine, the report says, came a distant second.

Vallarasu - a nation capable of nuclear warfare, but in this case, for no particular reason refers to the hero's name. Vallarasu is a landmark movie in world cinema where the hero is a all-conquering police officer who drives from spencer's signal to marina beach, right from the middle of a traffic jam, within 5 minutes, in a town bus, laden with explosives, to save chennai from total annihilation. Mclaren Mercedes are said to be astounded by this fact and are negotiating with "Karuppu Nila - The Black Moon" to drive for them next season.